How to Start Swinging with your Partner

Interested in knowing more about swinging and the swingers lifestyle? Find out about the different types of couple swinging and everything else that you should know about how to start swinging  with your partner.

How to start swinging

Do couples actually swing in real life? Why do couples swing in the first place?

As complex as our anatomical set up and mind, our nature, characteristics, lifestyle and social behaviors are unique phenomena too.

We have an insatiable appetite for at least one thing in life, be it food or intimacy, as examples.

Leaving food on the table, we stray into a familiar territory to take a dig on an act of physical intimacy. Intimacy is a term stretched to every direction and now it’s slanting towards swingers and couples that want to start swinging.

Swinging is a non-monogamous activity of physical intimacy treated much like any other social activity, that can be experienced as a couple. It has a recreational perspective. Swingers indulge in intimate acts with someone other than one’s spouse/primary partner, with the full knowledge and consent of that person.

Swingers have been thriving since the beginning of recorded time. In the era of flower power, swinging was a very “in-thing” and among the most popular “culture”. It has had different social standings through time, of course! The phenomenon of swinging may be seen as part of the revolution of recent decades.

Swinging is like a sport for people who believe physical attraction is part of human nature and should be openly enjoyed by a committed or married couple.

Typically, swinging activities occur when a married or otherwise committed couple engages in carnal activities with another couple, multiple couples, or a single individual. The most common method is an adult male and female couple, meeting other pairs for lovemaking and physical intimacy, and sometimes ongoing intimate relationships. The activity may occur at a swing party, a couple-to-couple encounter, a liaison, or with a third person in a threesome.

How to start swinging – The different types of swinging couples

During these events, swingers acknowledge lovemaking as a game and participants as team-mates. There are few ground rules, but none etched in stone. The prominent carnal activities, but definitely not limited to, are several to mention, but a few of the most popular ones include:


It is the form of pleasure which involves making out with a partner while being watched by at least one other person.


Watching others doing or performing the big bang. It is acceptable in the group event, but not in private areas.

Soft Swap

It involves kissing and stroking and the basics in blowing a guy or tickling a girl down south, with multiple partners. This can be indulged during the threesome, group romp, or while swapping partners.

Peak Swap

This is to have penetrative physical sex with someone other than one’s partner. The idea is almost the definition of swinging, but not necessarily the same.

Group Game

This term signifies the activities involving multiple players in the same lay-out. It usually defines a group of four or more people interacting physically. The most common is two couples, although it can be any gender of four or more people.

Ménage a Trios

Also known as threesomes, this is one of the most common methods of starting in the swinging lifestyle for beginners. A lot of couples will carry on with threesomes long after they become an integral part in swinging. In this, all three involved people interact with each other in bed.

Extreme Measures

These include things such as spanking, bondage, and water sports. The majority of these are very uncommon at most swingers’ parties unless the hosts have chosen a theme for the night, in which case you will be notified well before the night of the party.


People of the same gender interacting with each other sexually. This is much more common between women than men, but it doesn’t mean every woman will indulge in it. Bisexuality between men is extremely rare in the swinging community, and is usually frowned upon if not organized prior, and is usually preferred in a separate area.

Now that you know how to start swinging and also the different types of swinging, click here to continue reading about the rules of swinging.

The 10 Rules of Swinging

Rules of Swinging

What should you know about swinging before you try to swing with your partner? Here are the ten most important rules that every swinger couple should know and follow to make sure you have a good time while swapping partners.

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Like any other human activity, swinging also has its pros and cons. A few basic laid down principles can make swinging fun and foul-free, every time.

1. One goes, both go

Come as a couple and leave as one. It is not preferable if one goes while the other lags behind. Always go hand in hand without leaving your partner behind. Swinging is safer and easier if both partners are comfortable indulging in it. It is a team game. Not a solo affair.

2. Punctuality 

Arriving at the correct time applies here as well. Turning up late at a party is a turn-off. By the time you’re in, the night would be in full swing. You’d only end up making people who are already in the act feel awkward. You won’t know where to fit in too. Inform the host beforehand if you are going to be late. Or you may not be invited again.

3. Courtesy

The lifestyle of the swingers isn’t a piece of cake. Sometimes it is complex and complicated with lots of insecurities and uncertainties. Courtesy is the key to ease up. Behave with people just like you would like them to behave towards you. Be sensible, thoughtful and understanding.

4. Reply to Invitations

Even if you don’t wish to attend, answer to all invitations. It is very annoying for a host if they don’t know how many people are going to turn up. Reply by phone or mail and express your gratitude for the invitation.

5. Gift for the Host

Don’t go to a party empty-handed. Ask the host about what you could get for them. Get something racy or simple for the hosts every time you attend a swingers’ party. See, it’s just like a normal party, isn’t it?

6. The Right Attire

Wear clothes that are practical and will be comfortable for you as the night progresses. Carrying a robe or a negligee is a good idea. Take only as much cash as you require. Keep your bling, jewelry and other valuables to the bare minimum. Losing them will be headache to you and an embarrassment to the hosts.

7. Health and Hygiene

Oral hygiene is a basic necessity for everyone. Bad breath or body odor is a big turn-off for your potential partners. Shower and groom well before you leave for the party. Good cologne, perfumes or body sprays will give you the edge in the environment. The best way to enjoy the party is by freshening up as you reach there.

8. Enjoy Yourself 

The whole idea is to have fun and enjoy your time there, so participate in activities that make you feel comfortable. Don’t let anyone pressurize you to do something you don’t like. This may be the most important one. Approach every activity with an open mind and positive attitude. Act out your fantasies, and enjoy yourself.

9. The Right to say ‘NO’

This is the fundamental etiquette in swinging, the right to say ‘no’. It is simple and straightforward, and polite to say ‘no, thank you’. Explanations and alibis aren’t required as these may cause embarrassment and hurt you. You shouldn’t be afraid to decline an invitation. It is the only way to avoid doing something you might regret afterwards. And that might just create more ill-feelings and embarrassment.

10. Friendliness

Be a friend to all, even if you don’t want to extend the night or don’t have any interest in getting physical with someone. You may catch a vibe by being nice with the others in the community. They may put you across to people who you may be interested in.

Swinging can be every bit as invigorating, exciting and fulfilling as you can ever imagine. It opens a window to explore your favorite fantasies in safe mode. You and your partner can work out in private, and yet you can enjoy another couple or get a group swing in just one evening.

Meeting new interesting people and making bold friends are potential side-effects of swinging. Swinging also has the common positive effect of enhancing your relationship and personal life to a great extent. The positive feeling about yourself, your mate, and your relationship is the most important factor while swinging.

Christians set up SWINGERS network to spread faith

DEVOUT Christians have set up a SWINGERS network as a way to introduce others to faith – while indulging in extra-marital sex.

By: Dion Dassanayake
Published: Thu, September 25, 2014

Cristy and Dean Parave regularly enjoy swapping partners with other couples as they try to spread the word of God to those who are not religious.

The fitness fanatics said they do not think they are committing adultery and that the Almighty would not be angry with having sex outside of marriage.

Bisexual mum-of-three Mrs Parave studies the Bible with her husband of seven years but gets into bed with other people at her partner’s consent.

She said: “I don’t think God would be mad at what we are doing – at first I was conflicted but the more we looked at it the more it makes sense to us. Dean and I are both in agreement with this lifestyle, so we’re not committing adultery.”

“God put people on the earth to breed and enjoy each other – I feel God is always with me and he has put us here for a reason.”  

The couple, who met on a dating website eight years ago, set up from their home in Florida, America.

The exercise-mad pair, who both compete in bodybuilding competitions, were introduced to the world of swinging after a chance meeting in a supermarket.  A couple approached them and asked if they were swingers and she thought they meant “swing dancing”.

After researching it at home the pair, who have sex twice a day, started to dabble in swapping partners. Mrs Parave said: “I had a very sexually adventurous friend who knew about swinging. I asked her if she wanted to try with Dean and I.” Dean didn’t know what was happening, he thought it was a trick and I was trying to catch him out.”

The couple set up their swinging website two years ago and travel around America meeting people and swapping partners. Mrs Parave, who has three children from a former marriage, said her and her husband’s parents know about their extra-marital sex and are happy for them.

Fitness instructor Mr Parave was an alcoholic and drug addict before finding Jesus following a drink-drive arrest. He said: “I turned my life around, began bodybuilding and now I try to live pure. God has put me here to spread his word and our lifestyle community is a great place to do it. You can’t get closer to someone than having sex with them.”

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Why couples should attend a swinger club

Positive aspects of attending a swinger club as a couple

Swinging is a social exchange that entails sexual exchanges. It’s important to understand that these sexual encounters do not mean infidelity in any way.

swinger clubAdmittedly, things can get a bit dull after years and months of being in a sexually monogamous relationship. A good solution most couples explore is swinging as a method to enliven their shared lives. These couples begin to experiment with a swinging lifestyle and realize that this allows them to inject sexual variety and stir otherwise stagnant bedroom experiences up.

For some couples that dabble in swinging, the thought of seeing and sharing their partner in front of strangers can be highly arousing and sexually freeing. However, after a few trysts with others, couples are instead likely to enjoy love-making with each other more than before. They would also experience more passion in their sex life.

How is this possible? How does this work?

One of the prime causes of infidelity is bedroom boredom. It’s natural for this to happen when two people have been in a monogamous relationship for a long time. The chief complaint is love-making becoming routine and extremely predicable. Sometimes, so much so, that both parties go through the sexual process on auto-mode. Being in this state could be detrimental to the love life.

When the relationship progresses to this stage, it’s only a matter of time before you or your spouse begin to look elsewhere to feel passionate and alive again. This inevitably leads to external affairs, which honestly, is not the ideal solution.

Swinging would otherwise, offer a brief release to sexual stagnation and does not carry the stress of having an affair. It also removes the fear of being found out. As both parties are on the same page, there will be no household drama or accusations over cheating. Occasional swinging jaunts with an outsider can actually keep the marital couple together. Some couples decide to join a rating website, while others like the public approach and attend a local swingers club.This works by helping them to rediscover and relook at the delights of their primary partner, framed in a different context from where they primarily started off from.

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Swinger Cruise Croatia

Swinger Cruise Croatia

A new, interesting project is about to see the light of the day – Swinger Cruise Croatia. A Croatian based adult travel agency will offer deluxe cruise ship experience with up to 20 couples on board. The cruise ships they offer are luxurious and the cabins are fantastic.

They will also offer Swinger Sailing Boat experience. With 5 to 10 yachts forming a “swinger fleet” this adventures concept might be the begging of a new era of swingers tourism. Flexibility, adventure and fun! All discreetly warped up in a package that contains not only a lot of swinging fun, but also endless possibilities to explore the wonderful Adriatic sea.

Their website ( is currently under construction but stay tuned for more information here on Swinger Club Map.